Following on from my last post, this post discusses the final two phases on a journey toward meaning.
Dr Dyer says that we know when we are approaching the meaningful phase in our lives because we realise that aligning ourselves to ambition, competition and materialism becomes very unfulfilling. In this phase it becomes more obvious that we need to let ourselves be lived by life rather than trying to live it.
The shift can occur in many ways, it can be just a comment, a coincidence, a particular event but the end is always the same. We begin to realise that we are not here to push life to make it a struggle all the time, we are here to enjoy and to live in peace.
Abraham Maslow says that if we want to achieve self-actualisation there are two things we need to do, we must be independent of the good opinion of others and we must become detached from the outcome, both of which an ego driven life would struggle with greatly. As we experience ‘the shift’ as Dr Dyer calls it, our inner calling of being fulfilled becomes a priority and everything else takes a back seat. We begin to make choices from the authentic self rather than from our ego. We know the difference because the feeling we get when we make choices from our authentic self is bliss.
As we travel back toward a life of meaning we begin to change what constitutes our definition of success. We get to a place in our life where we start to be guided by something that is larger than ourselves and once we have experienced this shift we can never go back. We learn to stop interfering in our own lives and to trust in the very wisdom that created us.
One of the things that happens when we move away from ego is that we move from a sense of entitlement to a sense of humility. We realise that we are not ‘entitled’ to anything. So we begin to shift our thoughts from “how can I get” to “what can I offer” and “how can I serve”.
As we move into the meaning phase of life it is not as though we are no longer ambitious it’s simply that we have ambition with meaning, that we are ambitious about other things. Our ambition is transformed into purpose and we learn to step back and trust in the process of life. We learn to detach from the outcome and this detachment allows us to no longer be fighting which allows things to just come to us. Instead of being the person who is trying to make things happen we allow them to show up, the fight is gone.
At the end of his movie Dr Dyer recites this:“There is a place deep within us that wants to feel fulfilled, it wants to know that my life has made a difference, that I have left this place, this planet that I have lived on better than when I arrived, that someone’s life has been profoundly touched because of my existence. We all want that. It isn’t about age or about finding yourself whatever age, wherever you are, you are only a thought away from changing your life.”
When we make the shift there are no limits – only possibilities